Category Archives: Transition Posts

Posts that deal with the often confusing and sometimes painful transition from active duty to retirement

Starting a new career, Part 2

Posted by Mike Grice on

When I last left you we were working on a little self discovery.  A big part of starting anew is finding out what you are really suited to do; not just what you want to do or are good at, but something that will be rewarding and meaningful.

That isn’t to say that you can’t go out and be whatever you want to be, but we live in the real world and not everyone is independently wealthy or capable of living on dirt, rocks, and rainwater.  As you depart the service you have a whole new life to live, and the best way to live it is to have an idea of where you really want to go.

In the previous post I left you with four sheets of paper in front of you.  It has been a few days, so you should have one sheet filled out with a list of things that you are good at and another with a list of things you are bad at.  Go ahead an put those two sheets aside for now, but don’t lose them.  We are going to need them in a few days.

Now take out the two blank pieces of paper.  Our previous lists evaluated our skills, and today we are going to look into ourselves and evaluate what our desires are.  These are not the same things as skills!

Here is why.

Everybody has had a job that they hated.  Maybe it was delivering newspapers in the snow and rain, and maybe it was working in an office.  You were probably very good at whatever that detested job was, but just because you were good at it doesn’t mean that you want to do it for the rest of your life.

So, as you probably have guessed, you are going to pull the first sheet of paper out and write this at the top in big, bold, capital letters:

THINGS THAT I LIKE TO DO

List out those things that you really enjoy.  Not just work or professional items, but everything that you truly take pleasure in doing.  Maybe it is fishing.  Perhaps you love writing.  Maybe you love the outdoors…or the indoors…or watching football.  Your list is yours.  Take some time and write things down that make you happy.

As you have probably also guessed, the next sheet of paper should have this written at the top:

THINGS THAT I HATE TO DO

Go ahead.  Vent.  It is good for the soul to actually put on paper those things that you absolutely despise.  It doesn’t only have to be things that you abhor, so go ahead and include the things that you just don’t like.  After all, you are in the driver’s seat of the car that will take you through the rest of your life, so why not make it a sweet ride free from the stuff you don’t enjoy?  Think beyond the context of work – do you hate crowded places?  Cigarette smoke?  Broccoli?  Whatever it is, write it down.

Take a few days to compose your lists.  Have them handy and jot down things as they pop into your head.  Sleep on it.  You’ve got a few days until we take the next step, so go ahead and take your time.  Write as much as you can!  The more you vent the better you will feel, and also the more you write the more effective this exercise will be for your future.

Starting a new career

Posted by Mike Grice on

One of the things about transitioning from the military is that you cross a very bright line from being in uniform to being out of uniform.  One day you are lacing up your combat boots and saluting the flag while the next you are suddenly faced with deciding, on your own, what shoes you are going to wear after sleeping in well past reveille.

It can be a bit jolting. One of the most jarring bits is realizing that you have crossed the line into the civilian world, and that there is no going back. With that realization comes the need to start your next career, and that is what we are going to be talking about for the next few posts.

Before you can find a job or a new career you need to determine where you want to go.  For a lot of reasons it isn’t as easy as it seems!  Where do you even start?

You start by getting out four sheets of paper.

Take two of those sheets and set them aside- they are for the next post.  The two that remain are today’s focus. A real challenge that transitioning military types face is not just what they want to do in the future, but what are they suited for?  What is really a good career choice for the way ahead?

It isn’t that people don’t have an idea of what it is they would like to do next, but they don’t know how to get there.  How do they start a new and rewarding career? We’ll go down that road together, starting with your two blank pages. At the top of the first sheet write, in big capital letters:

THINGS I AM GOOD AT

Now start listing things that you are good at.  Not just work, but hobbies, sports, or anything else that you (or others) feel that are your strengths.  Maybe you are a great aircraft mechanic.  A terrific infantryman.  A woodworking hobbyist.  A mountain biker.  Whatever it is that you are good at needs to go on the list.

Now pick up the second sheet.  On this one, write in big capital letters:

THINGS I AM BAD AT

This one is more difficult than the things that you are good at because it requires a certain amount of reflection and honesty about your abilities and talents.  Once you begin, though, it is surprising how quickly it is populated.  Maybe your penmanship is terrible (like mine!).  Maybe you can’t type.  Really take a look at yourself; are you indecisive?  Maybe a little too decisive?  Are you overly aggressive or passive?  Are you an introvert who finds cocktail parties excruciating?  Afraid of public speaking?

Take the lists with you for a day or so.  Don’t expect to write everything down at one sitting, but instead jot down bullets as they come to you.

Then sleep on it.  When you get up the next day take a look at the lists again over your coffee and breakfast.  I guarantee that you will have a few more thing to jot down.

I’ll give you a couple of days to work on your lists.  Then we’ll get to work on your other two sheets of paper…..

Good luck and be honest with yourself – especially on the second list!  It will pay off in the future.  I promise!

Another column in the North County Times

Posted by Mike Grice on

Hello again!  I have been a bit task saturated this week, so I apologize for missing out on presenting more transition content.  I will fix that next week- I promise!  I did manage to bang out a column for the North County Times.  Here it is:

So there I was. All good military stories start that way —- even the true ones.

So there I was. I had experienced a jarring moment of clarity and recognized that I had PTSD. After quickly going through things like denial and blame shifting, I decided that I did indeed have a problem —- and in typical Marine Corps fashion, it was up to me to figure out what to do about it. Waiting around for someone else to show up and solve your problems is not how Marines operate, so I swallowed my pride and picked up the phone.

I called the Deployment Health Center on Camp Pendleton. They were surprisingly supportive and had obviously received plenty of calls from pensive Marines who, like me, were seeking help but were not quite sure how to go about it.

“Come on down,” said the voice on the other end of the line, “We’re here to help!”

So down I came. The center, next to the Wounded Warrior battalion and just down the road from the base hospital, is specially designated to help Marines and sailors returning from combat deal with the stresses associated with deployment and the return to society. In typical military fashion, it is an unassuming “temporary” building that has been in use for years and will likely be there for many more years to come, but in its own quaint, utilitarian way, that is perfectly OK. What it looks like is not nearly as important as what goes on inside.

In I went, and as I walked down the passageway I was instantly conscious that all eyes were upon me as I passed by Marines and sailors and civilians. I felt a little uncomfortable, particularly considering the enthusiastic reception that I had received on the telephone only a few minutes before.

I found the door I was looking for and went in. Several Marines were seated in a small reception area, and they warily glanced in my direction, then quickly looked away. Odd.

At the reception counter, I was met by an obviously efficient and experienced receptionist who unflinchingly looked me squarely in the eye and asked if there was anything she could do for me.

As I explained that I was there to arrange for an appointment her features softened, and she smiled. “Sure!” she said. “We’ll set you right up. Please fill out these forms and bring them back up as soon as you are finished.”

So I found a seat in the waiting room and started writing. As I did so, the tension flowed out of the room, and the atmosphere subtly changed.

It changed because when I walked into the room, I was perceived as a personification of the institution that is the Marine Corps —- a senior officer and an authority figure who was intruding into the sanctuary of the Deployment Health Center, where people who were not seeking help are outside the circle of trust.

As I penned my answers to the questions on my clipboarded form, however, my threatening stature as an instrument of authority evaporated, and it became clear that I was not looking for people who were seeking help. I was joining them.

During the year and a half of Wednesday afternoons I spent at the center, I noticed something. I must have seen hundreds of others seeking help, but in all of that time I saw a grand total of one other officer seeking treatment, and one senior enlisted Marine.

No wonder I was viewed with distrust when I first showed up; so few leaders sought help that to see someone like me in the building was surprising. I was a statistical outlier, but not because I was the only one of my age and rank who suffered from PTSD. There are many more like me.

But they stay away.

And the winner is…….

Posted by Mike Grice on

Well, if you are reading this post then you see the new format for Orders to Nowhere.  Many sincere thanks to everyone who helped me decide on a new look!  I received a lot of feedback from posts here on the blog as well as emails and Facebook messages.  Overall the most popular look was light grey text on a darker grey background (as you are reading now) but the format was “clunky” and unpopular.

So, as a compromise, I found this format.  I hope that you find it easier to read!!

Now, back to some transition stuff.

I got another letter from the Veterans Administration today.  I was excited, because I am expecting to hear from them in regards to any disability rating that I may have been assigned, but wary because they have teased me before.

Well, guess what.  Here is what the letter said:  “We are still processing your application…”

Sigh.

Teased again.

It has been nearly nine months since I submitted my package to the VA, and despite my efforts to be efficient and proactive my package sits forlornly on some desk somewhere as it wends its way through the bureaucracy.  At least I am not alone in my plight, though.  According to a recent article in the New York Times (http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/15/us/bay-area-veterans-disability-claims-are-buried-under-paperwork.html?pagewanted=all) returning veterans in the San Francisco Bay area are waiting an average of 313 days for a decision to be made on their case.

My simple math puts me around the 270 day mark, so I should receive at least one more monthly reminder that the VA is still processing my application.

I’m not complaining, though.  After all, nobody is shooting at me and the VA does have my address.  I’ll just keep an eye on the mailbox…

Last chance! Help pick a new look for Orderstonowhere (Day 4)

Posted by Mike Grice on

This is it!  The last day to vote on what you would like Orders to Nowhere to look like.  For those just checking in, here is what’s going on:

it recently came to my attention that some of you, my friends and followers, have a hard time reading the white text on the dark background.  In order to make sure that my posts are as easy to follow as possible, I am conducting a test.  For the rest of the week I am going to change the look of the page three times.  You, the reader, get to pick how it will look.  I will post each new page for 24 hours, and the page style that receives the most “likes” will be the one that I use in the future.

Thanks for participating in this test- Ready, Set, Vote!

Here is a recap:

Day 1 – larger black text font on a white background.

Day 2 –  medium light grey font on a dark grey background

Day 3 – light blue font on a darker blue background

Day 4 – the original format (smaller white font on a black background)

We’ll get back to the thrilling adventure of transition as soon as we pick a new page.  Let me know what you like and I will announce the results on Monday as we unveil the new look…

A test: Help choose a new look for Orderstonowhere (Day 3)

Posted by Mike Grice on

Hello again!

It is now day three of our test to see which format is best for my blog.  So far there has been a lot of positive feedback on the larger font and change in background color.  Thanks for participating and helping me decide!  Today we are trying something a little different with blues both light and dark.

For those just joining us, here is what is going on:

t recently came to my attention that some of you, my friends and followers, have a hard time reading the white text on the dark background.  In order to make sure that my posts are as easy to follow as possible, I am conducting a test.  For the rest of the week I am going to change the look of the page three times.  You, the reader, get to pick how it will look.  I will post each new page for 24 hours, and the page style that receives the most “likes” will be the one that I use in the future.

Thanks for participating in this test- Ready, Set, Vote!

We’ll get back to the thrilling adventure of transition as soon as we pick a new page…

A test: help choose the look for Orderstonowhere (Day 2)

Posted by Mike Grice on

The excitement continues to build as readers everywhere help me pick a new look for Orders to Nowhere.  For those who are just joining us, here is what is going on from yesterday’s post:

It recently came to my attention that some of you, my friends and followers, have a hard time reading the white text on the dark background.  In order to make sure that my posts are as easy to follow as possible, I am conducting a test.  For the rest of the week I am going to change the look of the page three times.  You, the reader, get to pick how it will look.  I will post each new page for 24 hours, and the page style that receives the most “likes” will be the one that I use in the future.

Thanks for participating in this test- Ready, Set, Vote!

We’ll get back to the thrilling adventure of transition as soon as we pick a new page…

A test: Help choose the look for Orderstonowhere!

Posted by Mike Grice on

Hello again!

I have been writing this blog for nearly a year now, and I have been using the same format and style sheet pretty much the whole time.  I have changed a few colors here and there, but stuck with the basic black background and white lettering for no other reason than I thought it looked good.

However it recently came to my attention that some of you, my friends and followers, have a hard time reading the white text on the dark background.  In order to make sure that my posts are as easy to follow as possible, I am conducting a test.  For the rest of the week I am going to change the look of the page three times.  You, the reader, get to pick how it will look.  I will post each new page for 24 hours, and the page style that receives the most “likes” will be the one that I use in the future.

Thanks for participating in this test- Ready, Set, Vote!

We’ll get back to the thrilling adventure of transition as soon as we pick a new page…

Latest column in the North County Times

Posted by Mike Grice on

Here is my latest column in the North County Times:

No one immune to PTSD

 

Never in our history has the military establishment or the nation been as forthcoming or accepting of combat stress injuries. There are programs everywhere to help those who suffer from the effects of prolonged combat. The Veterans Administration offers everything from individual counseling to residential treatment for those who have left the military, and active-duty personnel are afforded the opportunity to seek treatment without effect to their careers.

Well, officially anyway.

I recognized that I had PTSD after my third combat tour. I had just returned from Afghanistan, and with a roomful of Marines I sat down for a post-deployment briefing that was pretty much identical to the ones I had attended after my two trips to Iraq.

A parade of briefers that ranged from concerned professionals to bored bureaucrats passed before us, flinging a blizzard of papers for us to read, initial, fill out, and sign. We sat behind computer terminals to see if we experienced any traumatic brain injuries, listened to how important it was to be patient with our wives and girlfriends and kids, and not to go out and get rip roaring drunk on our first night home.

Somewhere between the brain test and the drinking-and-driving lecture, a sheaf of papers was handed around for all of us to complete. Not thinking too much about it, I grabbed my pencil and started filling in the little bubbles by the questions.

“Do you have problems sleeping?”

“Are you more irritable now than before you deployed?”

“Do you have problems remembering things?”

“Do you feel unable to relax?”

The questions covered the page. I marked the little bubbles one after the other, and when I was done I looked it over and dropped my pencil in shock. It wasn’t the first time that I had seen a form like this; in fact, I filled one out after every deployment. The difference this time was that I had a whole lot more questions marked “Yes” than there had been previously. Not just one or two or three questions. I said yes to more than half of them.

My reaction was, “Holy mackerel! I can’t possibly have PTSD —- only burned out losers have PTSD. Not me! No way!”

I walked up to the guy who handed out the forms and turned it in. He looked at it, looked at me, and asked me if I wanted to go see anybody.

That was it. I could say no and get on with my life. That, to be honest, is the course that the vast majority of military folks take. At that moment, that timeless span of a few seconds, thoughts rocketed through my mind. What will people say? Do I really need help? Is there something wrong with me? Only losers have PTSD, don’t they?

So I chose not to choose, but I did ask the guy for more information. He shrugged and handed me a brochure for an on-base facility that offered assessment and treatment with no questions asked. I looked it over, folded it up, and went on my way.

Moving on was not as simple as shoving the brochure in my pocket, however. I really started to view myself through a different lens; I paid attention to myself. I really couldn’t remember things even though my mind had formerly been sharp. I was short-tempered, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t relax. I came to the stark realization that I had changed, and not in a good way.

So I made a choice. I pulled the crumpled pamphlet out of my pocked and read through it. Not just another cursory once over as I had done before, but I really studied it. It promised an opportunity to be evaluated by a staff of professionals whose only purpose was to help Marines like me. All I had to do was make a call.

So I did. More on that in my next column.

A fascinating education opportunity: Fidelis

Posted by Mike Grice on

SgtMaj (Retired) Frank Pulley, a good friend of mine who is actively involved with military transition while representing the Marine Corps Association and Foundation recently introduced me to a remarkably innovative organization that offers a variety of opportunities for veterans and active duty folks to pursue higher education.  Promising education in and of itself is not particularly innovative – there are plenty of companies and schools in that business – but what makes this venture noteworthy is how it provides a comprehensive path from prospective student to employed graduate by working closely with colleges, universities, governmental agencies, and prospective employers.

The name of this great organization is Fidelis.  Named the Fast Company magazine’s #7 Most Innovative Company in early 2012, it was created by former Marine Captain and Iraq combat veteran Gunnar Counselman.  The company’s mission is to build a scalable solution to the military-to-civilian career transition in partnership with leading universities, military organizations, and great companies.

The idea for the company arose from Gunnar’s experience as he transitioned from active duty to the private sector.  As a veteran fresh from the fight in Iraq he entered the Harvard Business School, and upon graduation started a very successful career in the civilian world with a top-tier consulting firm.  During his graduate studies and his entry into corporate life he was startled by the differences between active service in the Marine Corps and life in the civilian environment and how difficult it was to make the transition between the two.  He mulled it over for several years, and with the conviction of someone willing to take the plunge he started Fidelis in order to not just help military folks make it through the transition by pursuing higher education but also to partner with corporations and business to employ them upon graduation.

Fidelis is much more than just a college and job placement firm.  It goes much deeper than that; each student works with a transitional coach and a network of mentors who help determine long term objectives, interests, and goals.  Once these are established, the coach and mentors guide the student through a tailored educational process that links their objectives with a personalized educational program that meets their educational needs.  With Fidelis’s help, the student enters college and obtains their degree – but the company’s commitment to the student does not end there.  The new graduate works with his or her coach, mentors, and the corporate sector to find the best employment fit.  The commitment does not end on the first day at work, either.  Fidelis is there for months afterwards to ensure that the transition process is successful.

The company has a broad array of colleges, universities, corporations, and business who all work through Fidelis to create the bridge from uniformed member of the armed forces to successful business professional.  They offer several programs that transitioning military people can pursue:

-2+2Plus: This program is for active duty personnel who know that they will be transitioning in the next year or two and don’t have a degree.  They can take general education classes using the company’s innovative social learning platform that marries courses from the  University of California with Fidelis’s learning program.  Designed to get the student back up to speed educationally and prepare them for enrollment in a full-time college or university while still on active duty, the technology used is flexible, intuitive, and supportive of the demanding requirements that are part and parcel of being in the military.  Once they leave active duty, the program continues as mentors and coaches guide the veteran to a college or university where they enroll in a program that meets their objectives and ultimately ends with placement in the private sector.

-Pre-MBA Bootcamp:  This program is for veterans who already have a college degree and are pursuing an MBA in one of the top 30 programs nationwide.  In conjunction with UCLA the program prepares the student with courses in finance, accounting, and quantitative analysis as well as providing an opportunity to socialize and network with other students.

-Silicon Valley Concentration:  Designed for veterans who already have a four year degree and are interested in the technology sector, this program is focused on a specific degree or discipline.  The program begins with a six week long course that introduces the technologies and companies that are the hub of Silicon Valley technology.  The mentors and counselors then work with the student to determine which aspects of the tech world that they want to pursue, and collectively they create a pathway to get there through focused training that results in technical certifications that bring the student to the cutting edge of ever-changing technology.  As with the other programs the mentorship and coaching does not end with a diploma, but instead follows the new employee as they pursue their new career.

All of this is done with little or no cost to the student other than the costs associated with enrolling in school.  The costs are borne by the companies that are investing in quality future employees and by colleges and universities who help educate veteran students.  Fidelis provides a remarkable opportunity for transitioning military people who want to pursue higher education and find a new career.  Take a look at what they offer- I am certain you will be as intrigued as I was!